It’s painful to watch someone you love struggle with drug or alcohol abuse. You know they can benefit from professional help, but how do you breach the topic and how do you convince someone who is reluctant to seek treatment to go to rehab? Substance abuse is often accompanied by feelings of shame and guilt. The stigma associated with substance abuse can be a major deterrent for those who want to avoid being judged or labelled.
Talking to a reluctant loved one about drug treatment is no easy task. If you push too hard, you will further alienate this person. If you say little or nothing, they will continue their drug use—and things can get out of hand in a hurry. Finding a way to get the message across effectively in a non-judgmental, and non-threating manner can be the first step in helping a loved one get back on track. But how to help a drug addict? The following are some tips to help you get someone help for drug abuse to join a substance abuse treatment.
Best Ways To Get Someone Help For Drug Abuse
Get Educated on Substance Abuse
To better talk to someone about their addiction, you must first understand addiction itself. There are many resources available to educate yourself on substance abuse. There are several excellent websites you can visit to gain knowledge. Examples of these websites include the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), and the American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM).
In addition to these websites, you can contact addiction professionals in your community. Contact your family doctor, hospital or local recovery advocacy center. These invaluable local resources can refer you to addiction and treatment professionals in your area who can provide education and support to help you better understand the complexities of drug and alcohol addiction.
Additionally, you can turn to family-centered sober support groups. Groups such as Al-Anon and Nar-Anon are geared towards family and friends of addicts. These groups are open to the public, and you can listen to how other families and friends of addicts learn and cope with the disease of addiction. These people can also be a great source of support for you, your family and your loved ones.
Find a Family Member or Friend in Recovery to Help You
A big reason why people are reluctant to seek treatment is they feel no one understands how they feel. Those who abuse drugs and alcohol often do so to cover up the pain of past trauma. There are many instances where an addicted loved one knows they are in trouble, and deep inside they genuinely want help. However, they feel alone and don’t think they will ever get well. In these cases, finding someone, who they know personally, that has been through the recovery process can help tremendously.
Having a family member or friend knows and respects that is in recovery can be of great help. These people are relatable, “normal” and can speak to your loved one at their level. Their stories of struggle, hard work and success can provide the motivation they need to overcome reluctance to drug treatment.
Use Non-Stigmatizing Language
Another reason why people are reluctant to seek help for substance abuse is the perceived stigma surrounding addiction. While significant research has provided a greater understanding of the factors related to addiction, there still are prevailing societal attitudes that addicts are broken people who in some ways are morally defunct. This type of stigmatism about substance abuse makes many of those in need of treatment afraid to reach out for the help they need out of fear of being judged or looked down on.
When you speak to a loved one who is reluctant to seek treatment, it’s important to approach them with non-judgment and compassion and understand that substance abuse is as much a product of circumstance as it is anyone’s fault.
Let them know that their addiction does not define who they are in totality, but rather a challenge they are facing in their life. It’s essential that they understand that substance abuse can be out of one’s control and can require professional help to overcome. It is also important for them to realize that what they are dealing with is not abnormal or a problem unique to themselves. Many people from many walks of life fall into the trap of substance abuse—and many of those people find recovery with drug treatment.
The language and tone that you use in addressing the situation are as important and the message and intent. Using language that stigmatizes, shames, or points the finger of blame, typically creates resistance and weakens motivation to change. While their situation may be frustrating and seemingly hopeless, remind them they have the power to change.
It’s important to understand that people in the same situation have turned their lives around and that drug treatment can provide them the tools they need to overcome their addiction and help them lead healthy, happy, and productive lives.
Affirm the Positive
As already stated in this article, substance abuse creates intense feelings of shame, guilt, and negativity. For many addicts, they know intuitively that they need to seek treatment, yet remain reluctant due to the negative reaction they will expect to face when coming clean about their addiction. In order to counter the negative emotions associated with substance abuse and substance abuse treatment, it’s important to focus on the positive aspects of getting clean.
Highlight what will be gained, such as a life of happiness, being able to restore relationships, and move forward with your life. It’s important for those entering treatment to realize that they are not being blamed for their situation, that it’s not a flaw in their character, nor does it define who they are as a person. Substance abuse treatment is simply a fork in the road, and a step in the right direction. Those who have been successful in their recovery can attest to the strength they have gained through the process.
Remind your loved one what you love about them the most. Bring up their strength, kindness, love, and resiliency. Above all else, let them know that you support them in their recovery, and you’ll be with them in their fight to conquer their struggle with addiction.
Be Sensitive to Time and Place
When you talk to a loved one who is reluctant to enter treatment, avoid having that conversation in group situations or other settings where it may cause discomfort. If possible, have your conversation one-on-one and in an informal setting such as morning coffee or lunch. You want to try and have this conversation when your loved one is not tired or overburdened with other stresses.
Large intervention style gatherings can be overwhelming and humiliating and are often met with an equal amount of resistance, which is counterproductive. Again, it’s important to avoid the instinct to shame someone in recovery, it causes more harm than good, and breaks trust. Try and approach your loved one in a calm and peaceful environment and approach the situation with a tone of compassion and understanding, to avoid resistance.
Handle Resistance to Treatment
No matter how you approach your conversation, you will undoubtedly run into some form of resistance. It’s tough for someone to swallow their pride and admit they are struggling with something that is out of control. Nobody wants to be labeled or identified as an addict, and understandably there will often meet resistance, especially when it conflicts with someone’s self-image. It is important to understand this is normal and to be expected.
Let your this person know that they are not being judged or blamed and that there are millions of people facing the same problem. When resistance occurs, highlight the importance of your relationship and what it means to you. Avoid giving ultimatums, as there will be ups and downs in recovery. Point out specific instances and areas of problematic behavior. Above all, try and keep your calm and engage in active listening. Do your best to remain composed and avoid massive blow-ups despite the strong emotions that accompany these types of situations.
Offer Help Without Enabling
To empower a loved one reluctant to seek treatment, you need to offer meaningful help and support. Offer to help them find a program they feel comfortable with. If needed, go to meetings or sign up for group or family therapy. You want to avoid engaging in enabling behaviors. Offering resources and support to help a loved one through the recovery process is much different than giving them the means to support their addiction.
Remember; it’s on your loved one to do the work, and not simply go through the motions to make you happy. Your role is to guide them towards the help and resources they need and empower them to do the heavy lifting.
Realize You Are Not Alone
Substance abuse is an issue that affects tens of millions of people in the US and the vast majority of those individuals never seek treatment.
Helping Someone With An Addiction
Talking to a family member or friend reluctant to seek treatment can be a difficult and draining process but can make the difference in saving someone’s life. It’s important to understand that you and your loved one are not in this alone. There’s an abundance of resources available to help you and your loved one through this process. The first step is to ask for help. At NuView Treatment Center, we provide a holistic approach to addiction treatment. Call us today to know more about our outpatient treatment programs.