How To Deal With Someone Who Is Bipolar And Angry?

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How To Deal With Someone Who Is Bipolar And Angry?

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Bipolar disorder is a mental health condition that affects approximately 4.4% of adults in the United States. People with bipolar disorder may have times of mania, when they feel highly energized and impulsive, followed by periods of depression, when they feel sad and hopeless.

One common challenge people with bipolar disorder face is managing relationships, particularly regarding arguments. Due to their condition, people with bipolar disorder can be picky and argumentative. This can make communication and conflict resolution more difficult for both parties involved. 

Understanding Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar Disorder is a mental health condition characterized by extreme mood swings, including manic (high energy, euphoria) and depressive (low energy, sadness) episodes. These fluctuations can significantly impact a person's daily life, behavior, and decision-making.

The disorder requires medical diagnosis and can be managed with medications like mood stabilizers, psychotherapy, and lifestyle changes. Its cause is multifaceted, involving genetic, environmental, and neurological factors. Understanding and managing Bipolar Disorder is crucial for maintaining mental health and quality of life.

The Link Between Bipolar Disorder And Anger

The link between Bipolar Disorder and anger involves a combination of factors including brain chemistry imbalances and environmental influences. People with Bipolar Disorder may experience varying levels of anger, which can manifest without specific triggers or as an overreaction to minor irritations.

The treatment for anger in the context of Bipolar Disorder often includes a combination of medications to correct chemical imbalances and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to modify negative thought patterns and behaviors. Effective management of bipolar symptoms also involves comprehensive self-care and participation in therapy sessions.

How To Deal With Someone Who Is Bipolar?

Strategies for Communicating with Someone Experiencing Bipolar Anger

  • Practice Active Listening and Empathy: When conversing with someone who is bipolar and angry, active listening is key. Show that you understand their feelings and are there to support them.
  • Stay Calm and Patient: Keeping your composure and showing patience can prevent the situation from escalating.
  • Setting Boundaries: It's important to set clear boundaries. This helps in managing expectations and maintaining a respectful environment.
  • Therapeutic Approaches and Support Mechanisms
  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This form of therapy helps in identifying negative thought patterns and behaviors and replacing them with positive ones.
  • Medication: In some cases, medication may be necessary to manage the symptoms of bipolar disorder effectively.
  • Support Groups: Engaging with support groups can provide a sense of community and shared experience.

How To Avoid Arguing With A Bipolar Person?

Tips for Handling Arguments: Here are some strategies to help you navigate arguments with someone who has bipolar disorder:

  1. Educate Yourself: Learn more about the condition and how it can impact behaviour during arguments. Understanding their experiences can help you respond more effectively.

  2. Communicate Clearly: Be as specific, calm, and understanding as possible when communicating with someone with bipolar disorder. Avoid vague or aggressive statements that might trigger a strong reaction.

  3. Take Breaks When Needed: If the argument becomes too intense, it's okay to take breaks and revisit the conversation when both parties have calmed down. Bipolar mood shifts can be difficult to deal with, and you can take breaks between extreme mood swings.

  4. Avoid Blame or Criticism: Instead of placing blame, focus on finding a solution together. Criticism or judgmental statements can escalate the situation.

  5. Validate Their Feelings: Acknowledge their emotions and show empathy for how they're feeling. This can help de-escalate the argument and build a stronger connection.

  6. Seek Support: It's essential to take care of yourself too. Consider seeking support from a therapist or a support group if you're struggling with managing arguments with someone with bipolar disorder.

Tips for Handling Arguments

What Are The Risks of Arguing with A Bipolar Person Who Has Bipolar Disorder?

Arguing with a bipolar person can carry certain risks, both for the individual with the condition and for those involved in the argument. It's essential to approach such situations with care and understanding to minimize potential negative outcomes. Risks associated with arguing with a person who has bipolar disorder may include:

  1. Escalation of Symptoms: Arguments can trigger mood episodes or worsen existing symptoms. For example, during a manic episode, an argument might intensify impulsivity, irritability, and recklessness. In a depressive episode, it could worsen feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and withdrawal.

  2. Strained Relationships: Frequent or intense arguments can strain relationships with family, friends, and colleagues. Individuals with bipolar disorder and those involved may feel hurt, resentful, or emotionally exhausted.

  3. Isolation: A person with bipolar disorder might withdraw from social interactions or become isolated, as they may fear that arguments and misunderstandings are inevitable in their relationships.

  4. Non-Compliance with Treatment: The stress of arguments may lead to non-compliance with treatment plans. Some individuals may be less inclined to take medications, attend therapy, or follow a management plan when feeling overwhelmed by conflict. You need to ensure they are getting the proper treatment for bipolar disorder.

  5. Negative Emotional Impact: Arguments can lead to negative emotional impacts for both parties, including guilt, regret, anger, or sadness.

  6. Relapse: In some cases, intense arguments may contribute to a relapse of symptoms or mood destabilization. This can set back the progress made in managing bipolar disorder.

  7. Safety Concerns: During manic episodes, individuals with bipolar disorder may become more impulsive and engage in risky behaviours. Arguments can heighten these tendencies, potentially leading to unsafe actions.

  8. Depression or Anxiety: Arguments can trigger or worsen symptoms of depression or anxiety in individuals with bipolar disorder, making it challenging for them to recover from mood episodes.

  9. Stigma and Misunderstanding: Repeated arguments may perpetuate stigma and misunderstanding about bipolar disorder within and outside the family or social circle.

What Are the Emotional Risks for Both Parties?

While arguments can carry risks for both parties, there are specific emotional risks that individuals with bipolar disorder and their loved ones may face during conflicts. These may include:

For Individuals with Bipolar Disorder:

  • Feeling misunderstood or invalidated

  • Increased feelings of guilt or shame

  • Self-doubt and low self-esteem

  • Difficulty managing emotions and regulating mood

  • Fear of losing control or being judged

For Loved Ones:

  • Difficulty understanding and responding to the individual's emotions and behaviour

  • Feelings of helplessness or frustration with not being able to "fix" problems or resolve conflicts

  • Emotional exhaustion from managing intense arguments or dealing with frequent mood swings

  • Feeling unappreciated or unsupported in the relationship

  • Struggle with balancing empathy and boundaries in arguments 

For Both Parties:

  • Tension, stress, and anxiety during and after arguments

  • Difficulty communicating effectively

  • Strained relationships or distance between individuals

  • Impact on mental health and well-being

  • Potential long-term effects on overall emotional and psychological health

Are There Any Safety Concerns?

It's essential to consider safety concerns when arguing with someone with bipolar disorder. In some cases, intense disagreements may trigger risky behaviours that can put individuals at risk of harm. These may include:

  • Impulsive or reckless actions

  • Self-harm or suicidal thoughts

  • Increased substance use or misuse

  • Aggressive or violent behavior toward others

  • Potential for physical altercations or injuries

Are There Any Safety Concerns

How Should You Approach an Argument with a Person Who Has Bipolar Disorder?

Approaching an argument with a person who has bipolar disorder requires sensitivity, empathy, and effective communication strategies to promote a healthy resolution. Here are some tips on how to approach such a situation:

  1. Choose the Right Time: Consider the person's current mood state. Arguments can be especially challenging during manic or depressive episodes. If possible, wait for a more stable moment to address the issue.

  2. Stay Calm: Maintain your composure during the argument. Avoid escalating the situation with heightened emotions or aggressive language.

  3. Listen Actively: Allow the person to express their feelings and concerns. Active listening can help you understand their perspective better.

  4. Use "I" Statements: Frame your concerns using "I" statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming or accusing the other person. For example, say, "I feel hurt when..." instead of "You always make me feel..."

  5. Empathize: Acknowledge the person's experience and feelings. Express understanding and empathy for what they're going through.

  6. Avoid Triggers: If you know certain topics or phrases can trigger intense reactions, steer the conversation away from those triggers to keep the discussion more constructive.

  7. Stay Focused on the Issue: Keep the discussion centered on the specific issue at hand and avoid bringing up past conflicts or unrelated grievances.

  8. Offer Solutions: Instead of dwelling on the problem, work together to find potential solutions or compromises. Collaborative problem-solving can lead to a more positive outcome.

  9. Take Breaks When Needed: If the argument becomes too intense or unproductive, suggest taking a break to cool off and regroup. Returning to the conversation later with a clearer mind can be beneficial.

  10. Support Their Coping Strategies: Encourage the person to use their coping strategies and skills, which they have likely learned in therapy. This can help them manage their emotions and reactions during the argument.

  11. Respect Their Boundaries: Be mindful of personal boundaries. If the person requests space or time alone, respect their needs and provide room for self-care.

  12. Avoid Judgment: Refrain from making judgments about their behavior or symptoms during the argument. Remember that bipolar disorder is a medical condition, not a choice.

  13. Follow-up: After the argument, check in with the person to see how they're doing. Offer support and reassurance, and discuss ways to prevent similar conflicts in the future.

  14. Seek Professional Help: If arguments are recurring or particularly challenging, consider involving a therapist or counsellor to facilitate communication and provide strategies for conflict resolution.

How Can You De-escalate the Situation?

De-escalating the situation during an argument with someone with bipolar disorder is crucial for promoting a more positive and productive dialogue. Here are some tips to consider:

  • Stay calm and avoid responding with heightened emotions or aggression.

  • Use active listening skills to understand the other person's perspective better.

  • Avoid using accusatory or judgmental language.

  • Take breaks if needed, and suggest returning to the conversation when both parties are calmer.

  • Show empathy and validate their feelings.

  • Avoid bringing up past conflicts or unrelated grievances.

  • Keep the conversation focused on finding a resolution instead of dwelling on the problem.

  • Offer reassurance and support

How to Set Boundaries in an Argument

Setting boundaries during an argument with someone with bipolar disorder is essential for maintaining a healthy and respectful relationship. 

What Are Healthy Boundaries to Have?

Healthy boundaries in an argument with someone who has bipolar disorder may include:

  • Not allowing the other person to use their diagnosis as an excuse for harmful behavior.

  • Refusing to name-calling, yelling, or verbal or physical abuse.

  • Respecting each other's personal space and time alone when needed.

  • Keeping the conversation focused on finding a resolution and avoiding bringing up past conflicts or unrelated grievances.

  • Not tolerating manipulative or emotionally abusive behavior.

  • Encouraging open and honest communication without fear of judgment or retaliation.

How to Enforce Boundaries Respectfully?

Here are some tips for enforcing boundaries respectfully during an argument with someone who has bipolar disorder:

  • Communicate your boundaries clearly and directly without being accusatory or aggressive.

  • Use "I" statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming or accusing the other person.

  • Validate their perspective and emotions while still asserting your boundaries.

  • Take breaks if needed, but communicate that you will return to the conversation later.

  • Stick to your boundaries and avoid making exceptions, leading to blurred boundaries and potential harm. 

  • Seek support from a therapist or counselor if necessary.

Getting Help at NuView Treatment Center

At NuView Treatment Center, we have a profound understanding of the distinctive challenges posed by Bipolar Disorder.

Our team is highly trained in clinical matters and deeply compassionate, dedicated to assisting you regain control over your life.

Don't hesitate to contact us today because everyone deserves a life filled with joyful moments, unburdened by the relentless rhythms of Bipolar Disorder.

FAQs

How can you differentiate between normal anger and anger related to bipolar disorder?

Anger related to Bipolar Disorder often appears more intense and less predictable compared to normal anger. It may arise without clear triggers and can be disproportionate to the situation. In contrast, normal anger typically has a specific cause and is more proportionate to the circumstances.

Are there specific techniques for de-escalating a situation when a bipolar person becomes aggressive?

Techniques include maintaining calmness, not engaging in arguments, ensuring personal safety, and trying to distract or redirect the person's focus. It's essential to avoid escalating the situation and seek professional help if needed.

How can family members or loved ones take care of their own mental health while dealing with a bipolar person’s anger?

Family members should prioritize their mental health by setting boundaries, seeking support groups, engaging in their own therapy if needed, and ensuring they have time for self-care. It's important to recognize the limits of what they can handle and seek outside help when necessary.

Cuellar, A. K., Johnson, S. L., & Ruggero, C. J. (2009). Affective reactivity in response to criticism in remitted bipolar disorder: a laboratory analog of Expressed Emotion. Journal of clinical psychology, 65(9), 925–941. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.20596

Jain A, Mitra P. Bipolar Disorder. [Updated 2023 Feb 20]. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Treasure Island (FL): StatPearls Publishing; 2023 Jan-. Available from: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK558998/

Chand SP, Arif H. Depression. [Updated 2023 Jul 17]. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Treasure Island (FL): StatPearls Publishing; 2023 Jan-. Available from: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK430847/

Rodrigues Cordeiro, C., Côrte-Real, B. R., Saraiva, R., Frey, B. N., Kapczinski, F., & de Azevedo Cardoso, T. (2023). Triggers for acute mood episodes in bipolar disorder: A systematic review. Journal of psychiatric research, 161, 237–260. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychires.2023.03.008

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Dr. Ryan Peterson, addiction medicine specialist at NuViewTreatment Los Angeles

About the Writer

Addiction Medicine Specialist,
NuView Treatment Center

Dr. Ryan Peterson, MD, specializes in Addiction Medicine and Pain Management in Los Angeles, with advanced training from The George Washington University, St. Vincent’s Hospital, Weill Medical College of Cornell University, and UCLA Hospital. Currently accepting new patients.

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